Baby Blessing

We blessed Arden on July 4 at church. It was a great time to have a baby blessing since all of David's family from around here could attend and David's dad flew out with his wife Marilyn from Utah.

A baby blessing is a special time in the Mormon faith. Basically, usually the father of the baby will give the baby an official name and blessing during church. The father speaks from his heart and pronounces blessings that hopefully will happen in the baby's life. Arden was perfectly quiet and still during the blessing. David gave a beautiful blessing, where he expressed what a joy it was to have Arden in our family. He also said he hoped that Arden will be a good example to her friends and that she will marry a good man.

I think baby blessings are wonderful because every parent wishes that their child will lead a blessed life. To hear the blessings that you hope your child can receive is comforting. I was so moved since I felt in my heart how blessed I was to be Arden's mother and to be a part of her life. Wow, I've used a variation of the word "bless" a lot in this post but sometimes I have to just sit back and think about everything I've been given in this life. Sometimes I don't know how I got so lucky. My children are gifts from God (even though there are days I forget about this!).

Arden is just a sweet, beautiful baby. She's still packing on the pounds like nobody's business. At her 3 month check up she was 15 pounds 10 ounces. Holy Cow! Actually, Ava pointed to Arden one day and called her a cow. Not sure why. But Ava pointed at me and called me a cow too on a separate occasion. That's okay, Arden and I can be fat together. This baby weight is not coming off quickly enough!

Arden will suck on the tips of her fingers and her little mouth makes loud sucking noises, especially in the middle of the night. We've tried giving her a pacifier a few times and Arden acts like she doesn't know what to do with it. She does the same thing with a bottle but we've only tried once. I've kind of shot myself in the foot with nursing her while lying down all of the time. She won't really nurse while I'm sitting down and it gets a little tricky when we're out and about.

Arden isn't making the strange noises she used to make (she sounded like a baby dinosaur from "Jurassic Park"). She doesn't coo a whole lot but just gives us a big grin whenever she sees us. She's a quiet one but I've gotten a few giggles out of her. Arden still likes to sleep a lot during the day. On the good nights she'll go for a five hour stretch, but there are usually two or three feedings between 8pm and 8am. She just doesn't have a schedule yet. She just doesn't like to be awake for more than 2 hours at a time.

We had a light meal after the blessing on the lounge area of our building

This is the same gown Ava wore when she was blessed. David's parents got it in Ecuador.

We had brunch with Papa and Marilyn at Sarabeth's. This place is delish! Arden is lying down under Ava's seat. Can you see her legs?

Buddha Baby

The two beauties. I've gotten a few comments from strangers that Arden looks like a doll. A super sized one. Ha!

Smiling all day long

She looks especially chunky and Buddha-like in this picture. The camera adds 10 pounds, right?

I love my fat baby. She looks like a jolly fat Buddha (no offense to any Buddhists out there) and I love her rolls. I loved how dainty and petite Ava was as a baby, but it is fun to have such a chunk this time. It keeps things interesting to have such different babies. Although I kind of wish I didn't have to carry Arden around in a carrier. My back may break if she keeps growing at the same pace.

She is 10 weeks old now. At her 2 month check up, she was looking healthy and didn't cry too hard when she got her shots. Her stats:

Weight-13 pounds 9 ounces (95th percentile)
Ava was 9 pounds 6 ounces
Height-23.5 inches (90th percentile)
Ava was the same height

Nothing too new to report on Arden. She is smiling a lot and cooing too. She is still sleeping a lot, with longer wake periods. She isn't on any sort of schedule, but thank goodness she usually sleeps in in the mornings. Sometimes she'll do a 5-6 hour stretch at night, but usually she wants to feed every 2-3 hours all day and night. I may be overfeeding her, since everytime she cries I pretty much feed her. She isn't spitting up as much, but is still as gassy as ever!

Life with two and Arden's updates

These beautiful "big sister/little sister" shirts are from Anne Willette.

Not really capturing Arden's sweet smiles in these pics...we really take awful pictures!

Reality has sunk in. Ah Ma and Auntie Michelle have come and gone, so I'm on my own for the most part. I have to say that going from one child to two is very difficult. There were some days where I felt like I would lose my mind. I would say the most difficult time would be in the evening hours, when I would attempt to make dinner, feed Ava, bathe Ava and put her to bed while trying to keep Arden happy. Lately David hasn't been coming home until 9 or 10pm, either from dinner with clients/colleagues, or studying for his Series 7 exam. I think I'm dealing with all of this a little better now because I've gotten more comfortable with letting Arden cry a little bit as I take care of business. Sad but true. I do feel guilty though. I never let Ava cry when she was a baby, but it's nearly impossible for me to pay as much attention to Arden as I would like. I feel like both of my children are getting shortchanged because at one point one of the two (or maybe both!) will be ignored.

Arden is still sleeping most of the day, once she gets comfortable. Arden will sometimes take forever to fall asleep. She hates to be swaddled but her jerky reflexes keep her from sleeping when she is not swaddled. I'm sure she would love to be held the whole time but as we've already established, she doesn't get that luxury. She is just the gassiest, gruntiest thing ever and will sometimes grunt for a long time, especially in the middle of the night. I've given up on using the co-sleeper , so I've got little Miss Grunty squirming around and grunting next to me. For a while I thought she was so gassy, spitting up a lot and had neon green poop because of something I was eating. I've cut back on dairy but I don't know if it makes a difference. Luckily the neon green poop has gone away for now.

She is now almost 7 weeks old. At her 4 week checkup, she was 10 pounds 1 ounce and 22 inches. Ava was 22 inches too but two pounds lighter! So obviously Arden is a chunkylicious thing. I don't have many pictures of her from when she was 2 1/2 weeks old to now. That's because she got the most severe case of baby acne I've ever seen in my life! I'm not exaggerating, people. Her skin has cleared up quite a bit but now we've got some crazy cradle cap going on. She is beautiful and so sweet but I can't wait for her crustiness to be over with! She has been smiling a lot, so I need to get a decent pic of that.

Ava has adjusted to life with little sis very well. However, if I say to Arden "It's your mama!" Ava will say, "No, it's my mama!" We had a few episodes of Ava yelling some weird syllable like "Baa!" into Arden's face but I put a stop to that. Ava also had to learn that she had to gently pet Arden like a dog if she wanted to touch her, since Ava was a little rough with her before.
Sometimes Ava will say "I'm a baby! Change my diaper!" I'm not sure if she wants extra attention or she just likes playing pretend. Speaking of diapers, Ava is still doing fairly well without them but I've learned the hard way that she needs to wear them during her naps and at night. I used to just throw away her poopy underwears but realized that wasn't being very economical and would soon run into a undies deficit.

Auntie Michelle came last month to help out and visit! We shared some treats at Central Park

Auntie Michelle and Ava at the American Museum of Natural History. Arden and I went too. Arden was so lucky to see all this at 3 1/2 weeks old!

Arden's first two weeks

Ava is always asking to hold Arden

Happy times together with Ah Ma

Our little baldie

The first two weeks of Arden's life outside of the womb have gone pretty smoothly but she is becoming decidedly more high maintenance as each day goes on. I think she is eating well and gaining weight as she should. I think Arden has a decent appetite and feeds at least every 2-3 hours, even at night. She was 7 pounds 7 ounces at her 1 week check-up (born 7 pounds 2 ounces). When I was nursing Ava, I was concerned I was producing "skim" milk since Ava was such a skinny minnie, but Arden is proving otherwise. Arden is a grunter and makes us think she is constantly constipated...but that is definitely not the case. One of my least favorite things about the newborn stage are the middle of the night squirty poops and surprise pee attacks. When I'm disoriented in the middle of the night and opening up her diaper, that's when Arden ambushes me and pees and poops all over the place. It's a dangerous and dirty gamble everytime I change a diaper...will she projectile poop or won't she?

While I am on this delicious topic, I'll discuss Ava's potty training. While my mom was here helping out, I thought it would be a great time to start Ava on a diaperless existence. There were a few accidents the first few days (Ava peeing in her pants in Central Park and pooing in her undies next to Arden's co-sleeper). But Ava has really done spectacularly well, with the help of jelly beans and lollipops. We started a chart with stickers but Ava was a lot more interested in her treats. I think I'll put a diaper on her everytime she sleeps for a while though.

It was great having my mom here from Arizona for a week. My mom adapted very well to city life and loved walking everywhere. Ava loved having her here and going to Central Park everyday. Ava liked to embarrass my mom by saying "we can't say boobies" everytime they were in the elevator with a man, or running up to people who were napping in Central Park and saying "wake up" close to their faces.

I keep hoping that Arden will be our "good baby" since we had our issues with Ava. Isn't that the way the universe works? You have a difficult first baby and the second baby should be a breeze. I'm not holding my breath right now, though. Arden is exhibiting the same type of behavior such as not wanting to sleep in her co-sleeper. Arden seems perpetually uncomfortable laying down or being held and fights us when we swaddle her. So we are trying to figure things out and get to know Arden and keep her happy. I am madly in love with her and can't bear to be apart from her.

Grandmother and granddaughter exchange tender looks

Ava was able to go Easter egg hunting at Central Park

Ava is looking too grown up

Arden's grand entrance

So I was set to be induced at midnight on April 1. However, I was noticing that something was leaking a few days before that... I finally put aside my denial and called the doctor on call and told him that I thought I was leaking amniotic fluid. I knew he would say to go to the hospital right away. I don't know why I was so reluctant since I knew deep down I was leaking fluid and not peeing on myself (sorry, got to be blunt). I just wanted everything to go according to the original plan (does this really happen with childbirth?). So on March 30, at 11pm, I woke David up and told him it was time to head to the hospital. I felt like I was having some contractions too. Julie, his sister, immediately jumped in a taxi and was at our place in no time to spend the night with Ava.

David and I hopped in a taxi and got to the Mt. Sinai's Women Center. It didn't really register in my mind that this was it. The nurse confirmed that I was indeed leaking fluid and strapped me to the baby heartbeat and contraction monitor. I had already been 2cm dilated for the past three weeks, so when the nurse told me I was still only 2cm dilated, I knew an induction was inevitable. The nurse put in an IV, which I think is one of the most horrible things during childbirth, and tried to relax for a few hours. David tried to snooze on the uncomfortable cot and I just laid in the hospital bed listening to 5th Avenue traffic all night long. Five hours later, at 6am, I wasn't any more dilated so it was time for the Pitocin. I was already dead tired by this point and wondered how long this labor process would be. At 8am, Dr. Kassenoff broke my waters since the leaking thing wasn't doing its job to move the labor process along. The combination of my bag of waters being broken and the Pitocin started to really kick in and my contractions were actually painful. I think I am a wimp because even though I was only 4cm dilated by this point, I was really uncomfortable. At 8:30, I was asking for an epidural. My anesthesiologist, who looked like she was 12, prepped me and administered an epidural and a spinal under the supervision of the Chief Anesthesiologist. The spinal was given just in case my labor progressed rapidly before the epidural could kick in. I jokingly asked if they could give David an epidural while they were at it, since we found out recently David has a herniated disc in his back and epidurals are supposed to help. But who am I kidding? I only cared about my pain at that point. The spinal made me very itchy, but I'll take that over pain any day.

For a few hours, labor progressed slowly but then I started to feel a ton of pressure "down there". Nobody checked my cervix again until 12:15pm, when Dr. Kassenoff came in and said, "Sorry, I've been on the phone with Bloomingdale's about furniture delivery." I wonder if she would be so nonchalant about it if I had been in horrible pain the whole time! She checked me and said, "Ok, you're ready to push. Give me 10 minutes to set up." So after less than one minute of pushing, Arden was out! The pushing part didn't really hurt this time, compared to the "ring of fire" I felt with Ava. However, both birth experiences have been quite similar: leaking fluid, induced with Pitocin, and not pushing for a very long time. It was such a bonding, emotional time for David and I while I was pushing. I was so scared because the pushing was the worst part with Ava, and I had hurt my tailbone. I dreaded hurting my tailbone again, but nothing happened this time, thank goodness. David was so supportive and everything went perfectly. No stitches were needed at all!

Arden burst into the world with a robust cry and a little bit of a cone head. She looked clean and just perfect, really. The nurses kept Arden on my chest for a while and I was able to nurse her right away. Then it was time to go to the recovery room. The recovery rooms are very nice, but unless you pay for a private room, you most likely will have a roommate. My roommate was a Korean lady, and we didn't really speak to each other except in the middle of the night when I kept accidentally turning her light on. I still wasn't able to sleep that afternoon because there were so many people coming in and out of the room. The whole roommate thing really is quite interesting but annoying as heck. There are curtains drawn to separate us, but I got to hear some of the conversations my roommate was having with her husband. Apparently she was displeased with everything he was doing and he was wondering why she was giving him dirty looks all day. Arden was doing well and nursing well this first day so she was totally quiet while my roommate's baby was having a hard time...therefore constant crying in the room and no peace for anyone. I knew they were rookies at the whole parenting thing and kept patting myself on the back because I thought I knew what I was doing. Little did I know I would have my own desperate times at the hospital!

David's brother Chris and his family came to visit that night and brought some delicious barbecue. Then visiting hours were over at 10pm and David had to leave me! People with shared rooms couldn't have anyone sleep over. So David and I looked longingly at each other while he stood at the door and left to go home. It was all very melodramatic but it was hard to say goodbye that first night. I'm glad he got to sleep in his own bed, though. I sent Arden off to the nursery so I could get the sleep that I desperately needed. Of course I didn't get good sleep because nurses kept coming in and out of the room. Nurses brought Arden in to be nursed a few times in the night. The next day, David was at the hospital at 8:30am and we just hung out all day. Ava was having the time of her life with Auntie Julie, Uncle Andrew and cousin Grant. She didn't miss us at all! Finally my roommate checked out and I took her spot next to the window with the gorgeous view of Central Park. I kept asking different nurses if it was possible to not have a roommate for my last night at the hospital.

Ava, Julie, Andrew and Grant came to visit in the afternoon and it was so nice to see her be so loving with Arden. It was a sweet reunion but Ava was ready for more partying with her Auntie and Uncle! That night, David had to go home again but this time I didn't have a roommate. It was bliss. However, Arden would not sleep and constantly wanted to nurse. By 1am, I was desperate and didn't know what to do since she had been nursing for over an hour. I wheeled her bassinet over to the nursery and told the nurse I didn't know what to do for Arden and maybe I wasn't producing enough colostrum. So with a heavy heart, I left Arden with the nurse who said she would try to feed her some formula. That did the trick and Arden slept for 3-4 hours. I couldn't sleep that night again, but this time it was because I was so stressed about Arden and I kept imagining a future with Arden where no one would ever get any sleep. Everything seems worse at night, so I was overreacting of course. Also, ever since Arden was born, my uterine contractions were so painful. How come no one had ever told me about that? Supposedly with your subsequent deliveries, your uterus has to work that much harder to get back down to size, and apparently mine was working overtime.

The next morning, we got ready to check out. I was ready to head home and be in my own space. I had one last visit from the lactation consultant, who tried to show me the proper latch. For someone who breastfed Ava for 20 months, I sure felt clueless. I still don't know how to get a proper latch, but somehow it works. I got a lot of surprised looks from nurses when I told them I had a 2 and a half year old. I guess I just seemed like a first time mom again. Finally it was time to strap Arden in the car seat, hail a cab and head home. Arden and I rested at home while David went to pick up Ava from Julie's place. It was so sweet to have everyone home together and enjoy each other's presence. I can't say enough how blessed I am to have such a supportive and wonderful husband and two beautiful girls. Also, the support from David's family here has really validated why having family around can't be beat!

Trying to be upbeat and not scared to death when the doctor said it was pushing time.

In the recovery room with Arden...still smiling at this point. The rough nights come later.

First day home from the hospital. Ava got her own special doll (gift from baby sister)

I love the wonder and awe in Ava's face.

And then there were 4

introducing...

Arden Margaret Smock

Born Wednesday, March 31st 2010, 12:31PM

7 Pounds, 2 Ounces, 20.5 Inches

Ava is 2 and a half

So Ava is officially a city girl now. She greets the doormen with a "hi" and a "thank you" when they open the door for her. She boards the bus and knows exactly where to sit. She patiently waits for the subway like a seasoned New Yorker. She likes to make small talk with the taxi drivers even if they are not very responsive. She pushes the elevator buttons like a pro and does not attempt to evoke our wrath by touching the "alarm" button anymore. She'll walk a couple of blocks without complaining...sometimes. Our first week in the city, she would always say "let's take a taxi" if we walked at all. So overall she is adjusting quite well.

Some of the struggles we have with her are probably just related to usual two year old sassiness. I feel like the scope of my parenting has come down to two methods: threats and bribes. We threaten her with time-outs and no treats, and bribe her with treats (her new favorites are jelly beans and chocolate 'chocayet'). Basically every meal involves bribing her with a treat if she would just finish her food. This probably sounds so mean but a while ago I would say she would have to sleep in Napoleon's cage (Napoleon is a friend's dog-not Ava's favorite dog in the world) if she didn't listen. Desperate times called for desperate measures. I've stopped doing that even if I was totally joking because I didn't want her to develop an unhealthy fear of dogs or have to go to therapy for years because I subjected her young mind to such a cruel possibility. So now the threats seem pretty harmless but I wonder how we can move away from threats and bribes in general.

Ava really is a dainty sweet little girl. She has been trying to assert her independence, but in so many ways, she is still our little baby (not for long!) She says some really funny things that I forget to write down sometimes. Here is a list of some of them:

"Are you happy?"-She asks this all day long, especially when she can tell we are losing our patience with something. Then she'll ask, "Are you upset?"

"Are you a good girl/boy? Are you a good mommy/daddy?"-She is pretty good at knowing who is a boy and who is a girl.

"Are you being funny?"-She likes to ask David this when she is on the phone with him.

"I'm hiding. Mommy, go to the couch."-If I find her trying to poop somewhere, she lets me know that she needs her privacy and I have to go somewhere else. Not sure when the whole potty training thing will happen. She thinks "potty train" is something you ride on.

"Stop bothering me!"

"Dorothy, this is how we eat a banana."-Ava loves watching Elmo's world and will randomly show Dorothy how something is done throughout the day.

Her favorite words to pronounce are "weather, another, other". She really emphasizes the "th" sound.

She has picked up the word "crap" from us and we don't know how to erase it from her vocabulary. We keep telling her that it is a bad word, but sometimes the second after we tell her to stop saying it, we say it ourselves and she'll chastise us by saying "don't say that, that is a bad word". A lot of times, I'll hear her whisper "crap" under her breath, or she will say it really slowly like "cccrrraaappp".

Ava must wonder why I'm always trying to get her to look at me with the sun in her eyes

This is a playground in Central Park that is just a few minutes away from our apartment. Actually there are a few parks really close to us. Ava roams free here.

Chasing after her is quite tiring at this point! But it is all worth it just to see her smile.

Plugging noses to get ready to go under water. The heated salt water pool in our building is awesome.

Ava really looks forward to daddy coming home from work and the whole family going for a swim. However, I may stop going because my 2 piece safari-patterned bathing suit makes me look like a mammoth jungle animal that should go into permanent hiding. I may have been indirectly charged with public indecency because all the residents got an email after I started swimming that requires all swimmers to be completely dressed in the elevators...oops.

So glad the weather is pretty good for these park outings!